To Preface and make things clear. I am very happy to see changes in how we deal with missing persons and children around the United States. I think John Walsh’s activism in this arena should be commended.
But now the dark side…
When I was growing up, John Walsh was like a crazy, in a not so good way, uncle. We saw him each week in the form of America’s Most Wanted. This was not a good thing. Among a myriad of things, the Adam Walsh case was one of the many little incidents that turned my biological mother into a maniacal person who obsessed with murders, rapists, and boogie men. Around every corner a bad person was there to hurt you. You always had to be on the guard. And each week, no matter if a repeat or not, we had to watch America’s Most Wanted so we knew who the bad people were who were trying to get us, and hopefully we would recognize them and get them caught!
At the moment, you may be chuckling to yourself. Usually this is the response when I tell someone this information, but let me now paint a picture of what this is like for someone growing up.
During the first 18 years of my life, I went to two birthday parties. One when I was in Kindergarten. His name was Andy and somehow my mother knew his mom (I am still amazed about how this came to be). Everything seemed great but, we were late getting back from Chunky Cheese and I was told I was never to be allowed to go on a party again. You see, at first, my mother insisted she attend for my safety, but Andy’s mom insisted it would be ok and that my mom should stay home with her new born son. But because we were late, how was she supposed to know that we were not in a car accident or a bad person had not taken me!!??!!
She was almost correct with her decree. In the 6th grade, I was allowed to go to Stephanie’s birthday party. This was because her mom was a substitute teacher at my school and it was to only be at her house. That was a disaster too because Stephanie’s mom at one point sent us out to play and because I was not in the house when my mom showed up, I was forever banned from birthday parties. I was punished and yelled at for hours because I did not stay in her house. I was foolishly not thinking about the perverts and murders who target birthday parties just to nab a child to rap or kill!!!! Stephanie’s mom was labeled as a bad parent because she did not supervise and left us in harms way.
And that is just the tip of the ice berg. As a child and young adult, you could never go to the bathroom by yourself. Bathrooms were a perfect spot for bad people to get you. I felt sorry for my poor brother because there is nothing like being 12 years old and forced into a women’s bathroom. Even if he did not have to go, we all had to go into the bathroom together because bad people wait outside bathrooms to grab children. If you were taking to long in a stall, you would get yelled at if you were ok.If my mom was taking a while and we were waiting for her, she would yell at us to communicate with her to make sure we were still there.
I said that I went to two birthday parties for my first 18 years. And I mean that was it. I was never authorized to go to a friend’s house to play. My friend’s parents were probably perverts wanting to hurt me. Friends could never come over because they could be hoodlums trying to spy on us and rob our house when we were not home. No sleep overs. For goodness sake… that was prime pervert targeting. I remember the time I showed my mom the sleep over invite. She yelled at me for not remembering the episode of America’s Most Wanted where the girl was raped and killed by a dad who held a sleep over for his daughter just to hurt a child. I learned never to show invites to my mother because of her America’s Most Wanted rants.
So I had books, figure skating, and school as places of refuge. While my friends were going to the roller rink, movies, and eventually dates, I had to stay home and watch America’s Most Wanted. The boogie man was behind every corner. No body was your friend, they were only trying to hurt you.
This has continued into my adulthood. If I do not call my mother about once every 1-2 weeks, I get frantic phone messages asking if I have been killed. She will call and leave random messages about how I should not go to Canada because they just had a murder there. Once when I was at the QFC in Northgate with my old roommates, she yelled at me to be careful because that was a dangerous grocery store. Last year, it was phone calls to move home because teachers were being targeted in Seattle. Bla bla bla.
I blame this on America’s Most Wanted. Go and watch the show. It sensationalizes the crimes. The reenactments are meant to scare. The whole show sets you up to think that walking out your front door will trigger some alarm for an evil person to come and get you. I have no problem with having a forum for presenting information about bad people who do bad things. I have issue with the way America’s Most Wanted does it. Preying on peoples inner most fears is not rational or safe. And it ends up harming people in the long run.
With that said…. I do not believe people should throw caution to the wind. People need to use common sense and good judgement when it comes to safety. BUT…. in the end… bad things happen to ALL PEOPLE. Yes… all people. What that bad stuff is varies and is not predictable. But in life, bad things will happen to you at some point or another. I think once people realize this, maybe they can start living their lives instead of hiding from unknown evils that could get you.
So John Walsh… I am sorry for your terrible loss, but I hate you. Your loss became mine. I lost my childhood for no other reason than a non descript boogie man was going to get me. Shame on you.
Tags: Amerca's Most Wanted, Boogie Men, John Walsh
